Are Your Friends Really Having More Sex Than You Are?

Most couples I counsel have infrequent sexual intimacy. This is usually a problem for at least one of the partners. Generally, I find that the higher the sexual frequency, the happier the marriage. Orgasms produce a release of oxytocin, the bonding hormone that makes a couple feel closer and more connected. I encourage a lot of sex in couples. So enjoy! I thought that you would find the following article interesting.


Are Your Friends Really Having More Sex Than You Are?
by Honey Berk (Subscribe to Honey Berk's posts) May 21st 2010 3:00PM

Categories: In The News, Sex

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Think the bed is always springier on the other side? It may not be true. Credit: Getty Images
There's always that one couple at the dinner party that can't keep their hands off of each other, pawing, smooching, calling each other "sweetie" and "baby," while the other wives and husbands try to keep from ogling and turn their attention to the latest neighborhood gossip.

We roll our eyes and snicker, but, really, we envy the love birds. Admit it, you do, too.

And, come on, wouldn't you just love to know how much sex your married friends are really having?

Well, now we have some insight, thanks to an Village survey of 2,000 American housewives between the ages of 18 and 49. So, try throwing out these stats at your next adult gathering: 23 percent of women reported having sex one to three times a month, while a close 21 percent say they have sex more than 10 times monthly.

Don't fret if your numbers lag a bit, just be happy you're not one of the 9 percent who reported not having sex at all in the past year.

Frequency, however, doesn't seem to be the only determining factor when it comes to satisfaction, since 77 percent of women surveyed reported they were happy with their sex lives, and 48 percent rate their husband as the best sex partner of their life. All great news.

But here's the bad news: 63 percent of women would rather be sleeping, watching a movie or reading than having sex. Maybe it's a matter of that same old, same old: An overwhelming 81 percent of married women rate their sex life as predictable.

Sure, once you discover what rocks your partner's world, it's safe to stick to what you know -- and, on this note, 70 percent of women said they know precisely where their lovemaking will take place -- especially among moms with two or more kids.

More than 50 percent also can predict the nitty gritty details -- including time of day, positions and length of time it takes to do the deed. One in five women can even pinpoint which day of the week sex will take place.

But, on the flip side, 19 percent of women are still looking for ways to mix it up in the bedroom. And more than half of the women surveyed seem to be doing just that, reporting they've used products to enhance sex with their spouse, including lubricant (41 percent), a vibrator (25 percent) or adult toys (17 percent). So, if your night table is strictly off limits to the kids, you're not alone.

Oh, and here's one last question we know you'd love to find out the answer to: Is it normal to bring George Clooney, Johnny Depp or your kid's soccer coach into bed with you? Six in 10 married women have fantasized about having sex with someone other than their husband.

Need more answers? Try the Kinsey Confidential website for questions you wouldn't ask your mother.

Related: Oral Sex is Not Really Sex; Just Ask Your Kids

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